NO “TELEPHONES”. TALK TO EACH OTHER. FACE TO FACE ONLY. WRITE A LETTER. SEND A TELEGRAM TO YOUR MOM. PRETEND IT’S 1860. LIVE.
NO ‘WRITING’… TALK TO EACH OTHER. THROW A ROCK AT YOUR MOM. PRETEND IT’S 10,000 BCE. LIVE.
URGGA. ROU GRAAURH. RUH.
<SMACKS HANDS ON WALL WITH PAINT.>
NO ‘HIGHER BRAIN FUNCTIONS’ …USE YOUR REPTILIAN BRAIN
EAT YOUR MOM’S CORPSE SHE DIED TO PROVIDE YOU WITH SUSTENANCE
PRETEND YOU HAVE JUST AROSE FROM THE SEA
NO “MULTICELLULAR TRAITS”….. USE YOUR SYMBIOTIC MITOCHONDRIA
REPRODUCE ASEXUALLY, YOU’RE YOUR OWN PARENT
PRETEND IT’S 2BYA
NO “LIFE.” USE FUNDAMENTAL PHYSICAL FORCES TO FORM SPHERICAL OBJECTS REVOLVING AROUND ONE ANOTHER IN SPACE.
FUSE HYDROGEN INTO HELIUM USING GRAVITATIONAL PRESSURE TO PRODUCE HEAT AND LIGHT.
PRETEND IT’S 4.5BYA.
STABILIZE INTO EQUILIBRIA
oh god its back again /rolls away
No words suffice.
(Source: agirlandhisplatypus, via amandapalmer)
I didn’t set out to be the first openly gay athlete playing in a major American team sport. But since I am, I’m happy to start the conversation. I wish I wasn’t the kid in the classroom raising his hand and saying, “I’m different.” If I had my way, someone else would have already done this. Nobody has, which is why I’m raising my hand.
Elena Delaware loves you and wishes you all the luck in the world.
One of the things on my list of things to do before I die, is to record the whole of this book. But if I die suddenly tomorrow of an unexpected rhinoceros attack, I am happy that I recorded the first 5 minutes…
Rhinos have been roaming Cambridge lately.
posted 11 months ago
The night before the exam:
20 minutes into studying:
A few hours into studying:
An hour before the exam:
A minute before the exam:
5 minutes into the exam:
Walking out of the exam:
When you get your grade back:
So so so true
This kittens are so trusting to sleep in a total strangers hood which just so happens I have a kitten in my hood this very moment who is sound asleep after exploring our porch like it was the most fascinating place on earth I will truly miss this little one the moment I leave for the dorm.
Don’t worry Dewey you are always gonna be my number one cat no matter how adorable the one in my hood is.
Dewey is the ball of fur glaring at me for disturbing her perpetual nap